Even though we spent Thursday night in the hospital, we were able to come home on Friday and had a pretty good weekend. For as quickly Cam's symptoms seemed to come on, they went away. His cousins were visiting this weekend and he was able to join them at the pool on Saturday for a little bit. Again, he sat on the steps and giggled as he shot his brother and cousins with his water gun. If that wasn't enough fun, he decided he wanted to go to the Durham Bulls game on Saturday night. Ernest and I both felt it would wear him out but he wanted to go and as I've said before, we try to make the most of every day. So we went and ended up having a really great time.
When he woke up on Sunday, I would tell he was incredibly tired. But he insisted on going to church...it was communion and he refused to miss it. He slept through most of the service, only waking up to take communion. I stood there and cried thinking how many times I have taken communion in my life and never took it as seriously as my son was at the moment. How many times a cold or sniffle has kept me from such a service because I would simply have the chance another time. I looked around the church and wondered if even a fragment of the people around me were as eager to get up and come celebrate Christ's sacrifice as my sweet little Cameron. Sick with cancer, drugged up to ease his pain, and tired beyond words...nothing was keeping him away.
It's been an emotional weekend for us. The ups and downs of this journey are exhausting and the decisions being made are not appealing any way you choose to look at them. So I will cling to Christ mainly out of desperation, trusting He will continue to carry us through this time and hoping that what spills out of my brokenness is even half as powerful as what has spilled out of Cam's. Love to you all.
3 comments:
I started to type something like, "I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw Cam there on Sunday morning!" but then I realized that just wasn't true. I was expecting to see you guys there because I knew how much Cam wanted to participate in communion. I'm so thankful he was able to..and a little bird told me that the pastor wasn't at all offended that he slept through the rest of the service! Love & prayers are with you.
When I think of Cam, I am reminded of Jesus's response about the faith of a little child. Cam has been and continues to be an example for us!
Praying God will hold each of you tightly so that you will feel His love and presence moment by moment!
Praying without ceasing for your sweet boy and family. Love, the lamm family
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